Sex Without Intercourse

Sex and sexuality are natural, pleasurable parts of life. Your sexuality lasts your whole lifetime and is unique to you. You are a sexual person whether or not you are having sex.

People can find intimacy, emotional and intellectual closeness, pleasure and orgasms from a range of activities that do not lead to pregnancy. Not having vaginal intercourse prevents pregnancy and opens the door for a better understanding of your own and your partner’s bodies and responses which could result in better communication and more satisfaction.

Use

Don’t have penis-in-vagina intercourse. If release of sperm occurs, keep it far away from the vulva or vagina.

Examples include: caressing with your hands, use of sex toys, oral sex, masturbation, same-sex sex, telephone or talking sex, fantasizing, play-acting, reading or writing your own erotic literature.

Waiting to have sex, taking a break from sex, or saying no to sex are also ways you can assert your personal power to prevent pregnancy.

Access

Free and available anytime.

Safer Sex

While preventing direct contact between the genitals is the only 100% effective means of preventing pregnancy, keep in mind that contact with bodily fluids still carries the risk of sexually transmitted infections (STI), including HIV/AIDS.

  • STI can still be passed from one person to another through bodily fluids such as blood, semen, vaginal secretions, and saliva.
  • HIV can be passed through blood, semen, vaginal secretions, and breast milk.

To protect against STI and HIV, it is necessary to avoid contact with fluids or add a barrier, such as condoms. Look for the Safer Sex Tips in the following sections for ways to protect yourself against STIs and HIV.

Masturbation

Masturbation is erotic self pleasure. It is using your hands or other objects on your own body to give yourself sexual pleasure. Masturbation can take on many forms, including but not limited to, manual stimulation of the genitals and the use of sex toys such as vibrators and dildos. It can often be enhanced by exploring fantasies. Since masturbation does not require a partner or anything other than your own hand, it is always available as a way to explore and have orgasms. Masturbation is normal and natural.

Masturbation increases sexual awareness and can be a powerful way to learn about your own body. For women, masturbation can help to locate the clitoris as well as other erogenous zones. Learning about your body can help you be a better lover in the future.

Safer Sex Tip: While masturbation includes carries no risk of passing STIs to other people, you may spread some STIs on your own body. To protect yourself from further infection, wash your hands in between touching different parts of your body. You can also use latex gloves and change them as you change which part of your body you are stimulating.

Mutual Masturbation – for Partners

Mutual masturbation is giving as well as receiving sexual pleasure using hands, sex toys, or other parts of the body. It can help partners learn how to better communicate and please each other.

Safer Sex Tip: To prevent the spread of STIs between partners, you can use condoms or latex gloves when touching a partner’s genitals. Use only one barrier at a time and dispose of them afterward. Female condoms can be used to fit inside the vagina and cover some of the vulva. Male condoms can cover a dildo and latex gloves can cover your hands. Do not share sex toys without changing the barriers used, or wash them well with soap and water and dry them completely.

Oral Sex

Oral sex is the use of the mouth to stimulate the genitals. The mouth can do many things to stimulate another person. Depending on your partner, different kinds of teasing, rhythm, and intensity will be preferred. Oral sex can be performed at the same time as other kinds of stimulation.

Safer Sex Tip: STI can be passed during oral sex. For cunnilingus, oral sex on a woman, or analingus, oral sex on the anus, a dental dam, plastic food wrap, or a condom cut open can be used to cover the area to prevent the spread of STIs. For fellatio, oral sex on a man, non-lubricated or flavored condoms are useful. Condoms with spermicide taste bad.

Anal Sex

For many people, the anus is a highly erogenous zone. A penis, finger or dildo can be used to stimulate the anus as well as to penetrate it.

Safer Sex Tips: Anal sex performed on a woman by a male partner without a condom may risk pregnancy if semen from the man’s ejaculation touches her vulva. While the chances are not as high as with vaginal intercourse, this is not a zero-risk of pregnancy activity. Sperm can travel from the perineum or vaginal lips to the uterus and cause pregnancy. Using condoms is much safer.

Anal sex can be performed with male condoms fitted over the penis or dildo to prevent the spread of STIs or the risk of pregnancy. Some condoms are already lubricated, but additional lubrication is usually needed with anal sex. Different condoms should be used for each partner and when switching between oral and anal intercourse.

Same Sex Sex

Having same-sex sexual experiences prevents pregnancy since it eliminates the possibility of egg and sperm meeting. Homosexual, gay, lesbian or queer sex can involve mutual masturbation, oral sex, anal sex, and other possibilities for stimulation.

Safer Sex Tip: Safer sex measures described in the above sections reduce the risk of STI/HIV transmission. The goal is to prevent partners from absorbing or ingesting each other’s bodily secretions. Use gloves, dental dams, condoms, plastic wrap and thoroughly clean sex to.

Other Ideas

Some other ideas for having fun while preventing pregnancy and disease include telephone, or talking sex, fantasy, story-telling, play-acting, reading, sharing, or writing your own erotic literature. In Sister Outsider Audre Lorde explains: “The erotic functions for me in several ways and the first is in providing the power which comes from sharing deeply any pursuit with another person. The sharing of joy, whether physical, emotional, psychic, or intellectual, forms a bridge between the sharers which can be the basis of understanding.”

Advantages

  • Always available.
  • Free.
  • 100% effective when used consistently.
  • Does not alter the menstrual cycle.
  • No hormones.
  • Does not affect future fertility.

Disadvantages

  •  Does not necessarily protect against STIs, including HIV/AIDS.
  • Can be difficult to maintain in the heat of the moment.